Had The Talk

Every once in awhile I feel like a Dad. I always know that I am a Dad but at heart what I feel like is a goofy kid. There are some days I do feel like a Dad- a good Dad. I'm proud of myself today. Whenever I look at Dexter and Oliver, I am proud but at the very same time wondering how in the world did I contribute to these great guys? Perhaps this is how Tim Tebow feels when he throws a pass 50 yards and someone catches it and runs in for a touchdown...

Last night I was determined to finally have the father-son discussion that I may have been avoiding the past six months. But really, I've been busy. Really, really busy.

Just the same, I have never experienced being on either end of this discussion. Remembering an older friend (who could actually cook spam!) who taunted me about my parents doing the deed- which I denied at age 16, and didn't believe until 18...I certainly owed this to Dexter.
Especially since I couldn't convince Maria to have the father to son discussion.

So where to have it? Somewhere where we wouldn't be crowded- somewhere open. Considered the Pier 39 Aquarium or the zoo- but Dext doesn't like to see animals kept in small places. Considered cafes but the thought of our discussion transferring to anyone's ears and to Dexter's discomfort wouldn't work but a place that might work would be- my workplace. A big space quiet and empty on a Sunday. Conference rooms or comfortable sitting places. Perfect.

I worked out an outline. The physics of it all. Why people do it; for love, for fun, to explore. The discomfort of the teenage years. Protection. Your friends will talk. Peer pressure. Being a gentleman. Listening. Not being afraid of being turned down by someone. Awkward moments. Privacy. Our part in this as support. We're there if he seeks us or not. 30 minutes in one of the Mothers Rooms. After laughter and some stumbling, it felt easy and good. I, we did good. My son. And I am his father.


although this picture from later in the afternoon leads me to believe that maybe I didn't communicate the concepts clearly. Son, you don't go in head first.