Adventure Days With Dexter

Earlier in the week I thought the most exciting thing I would do before this weekend was renaming this blog to one of my primary environmental concerns,
"Monkeys Will Eat Your Face "
However, sensing that Dexter's feelings might be shattered, I chose not to.
Instead I invited Dexter to participate with me in two endeavors, kayaking in the bay and riding on a zip line. He could have declined the offer and that would have been okay. Knowing his extreme fear of heights, I didn't expect him to do the zip line. I was pleasantly surprised when he told me that he wanted to do both. Later, eight stories up and waiting for launch, I would have preferred that he had chosen not to do so- for I was the one wishing that we were much, much lower.

After assisting me at work and making my day easier and less isolated, we set out to meet the in kayak deadline of 4pm, at Pier 40.

City Kayak is a small outfit and the one person running the show walked us through the tutorial. This would be Dexter's first go about in a kayak and he had concerns about 50 foot sharks, or sinking. I haven't been in a kayak since a couple of times with Maria, and some years ago. In our walk to Pier 40, I had left my change of clothes bag at work but as it turned out wearing slacks worked out better than Dexter's jeans, as most of the water did not absorb into my clothing. Leaving my dress shoes at the dock, we were set to go. He had us take several turns to show some ability and then we were on our own.

More experienced kayakers can head out in the direction of the Bay Bridge but our goal was to go to the area of the house boats in much shallower water. Once we got going, I realized that the two hours we had might not be enough for us to get there and back.


We huffed and we puffed, and rested. But when we rested, we tended to drift off and getting our momentum back was not easy. We were going against current in the direction of the ball park, and knew that it would be easier coming back. The tranquility and openness of sitting in the water appealed to both of us, so there were times when we would willingly stop and drift, knowing that later we would have to work hard to get back to where we were.


In that vastness I was surprised to hear someone call out my name way over from shore. It was Alicia from work, jogging around the ballpark. Of course, our attempts to glide over to say hello were more chunky/choppy than glide silky.

Very cool to go behind PacBell/AT&T park, under the 2nd street drawbridge (eerie and noisy), and make our way finally to the houseboats. This area where we have sat quietly waiting for the bat rays, watching from shore and now drifting over the water brought a thrill. We knew that if the rays were there they most likely would lay quiet avoiding the bulk of the kayak but by this time, we had perfected our glide and unity of movement and purpose.
Friday afternoon. Zip line at Justin Herman Plaza. Two folks had intended to go with us but both had to bow out for various last minute obligations. This normally would have provided me the opportunity to back out as well but Dexter was willing, and from our experience on the Brooklyn Bridge- that he was willing to face it would be an opportunity not to dismiss. So we went, with Cailin as our accomplice. The price for a 20 second zip is somewhat steep ; $29 each (you can go again for half the cost) but as a one time event, a fair value.

The instructions are pretty well designed and straight forward: step into the blue straps, pull this one over, and hold on to the buckle. A helmet is adjusted (as if it would help) and walk up the stairs. A lot of stairs. I was anxious about how many stairs. The way up is tented over so it doesn't feel open but you can see outside at the turns.
















At this point we still had two levels of stairs to conquer before reaching the top. At this point, I said to Dexter, "Two more levels?! REALLY?" In his mind, he was just wanting to get the event over but I needed to stop. I didn't like that I was the one who was becoming noticeably anxious. My fear of heights has become a managed one (so I thought) as I'm okay about being on rooftops, after having to climb some pretty shaky ladders accessing high areas when working with the maintenance guys at my cafe gigs.

Getting strapped in by two very nice gents at the top overlooking Justin Herman Plaza was nerve wracking. I checked with Dexter as to how he was. He said he was fine, brave and smiling-not unlike when he was the brave seven year about to undergo major dentist work. If he can keep it together, I should. It probably would not be a very positive memory of his father screaming like Chris Tucker and needing sedation. (keep it together, keep it together...) . Here's the thing; I was not ignorant of the good gentleman who securely strapped me in and while explaining the safety of the rig.
What got me is despite knowing this, my visual focus is the four steps in front of me which end into the oblivion of nothing, and I am supposed to step off into that? (Actually you get into a sitting position at the first step and at a countdown, you are eased into the air)




Here's Dexter soaring through the sky. He took off before I did probably because he was following directions. Eyes closed and lump like, I was sent off seconds behind.



However, once airborne and zipping- weightless, it felt great. Eyes opened you realize how good the birds have it; the view, the room, the speed.
Ah, this is the way to go if this was a way we could go. My girth picked up speed and I soared past Dexter at 500 miles an hour.









To slow you down, the zip takes a bit of an up track with a cushioned wheel or pad to break the momentum. Not unlike an unexpected jolt or shove. Then the guys unhook you, and you walk down a short flight of steps and looking up, relive the experience in words and feeling.
Awesome -but days later, we also remember how the view from the top is sometimes best remembered way down below.


look at my knuckles!

Cailin, not yet convinced that this is a venture that she is willing to undertake found us shortly after we made flat land. After comparing notes, we noticed all the cyclists, for critical mass. We also noticed, in a Where's Waldo sort of way one naked man, he at least with one well placed leaf ready on his bicycle. I can't say if I can recall if he wearing a bike helmet.

When we first came across the first naked man on a bicycle, the thought occurred to me that perhaps we haven't seen him since Bobby and Meredyth's wedding, and that he was the guy who should ride the zip line. I'd pay for that! Soon we found ourselves in what seemed to be the meeting point of all similarly undressed cyclists- none wearing well placed leafs. Cailin and Dexter found it difficult not to bust out in uncontrolled uncomfortable laughter. I of course, maintained a dignified manner drawing from years of being among crowds of naked men .

It was a peculiar finish to an exhilarating few days and yet, candidate for Best Day Ever was still on the horizon. Saturday, July 30 in Windsor CA. But that celebration, is for someone else's blog to reveal. For Dexter and I, these experiences are ours to remember, recall and rejoice. Well done Son.

Sunday, Santa Cruz

Sunday we fulfilled a promise to Captain Mike that we would take him to Santa Cruz for his first ever trip to the Beach Boardwalk. He's been wanting to ride the historic carousel which is one of the few surviving carousels featuring a ring toss. The carousel as designed by Arthur Looff is 100 years old and became a national landmark in 1987. However, I can't visit these places without hearing my brothers voice speaking about "Arthur Looff, the son of Charles ...".

I've learned the two ring pull as the carousel circles around past the one ring dispenser but i have not yet forgiven the Looff family for their right hand bias- to attempt to toss the ring into the clown's mouth requires a sidearm throw backward as your horse pulls away from the target.











Oliver probably had the most fun on the beach but Captain Mike joined us in dodging the waves.
I practice the art of never getting wet unless my intent is to get wet. Respecting the power of the waves and water but remembering that I am a human and my brain is bigger than the ocean's. I am actually a little worried that the boys will get flattened by the water so in my mind I think- okay, toss the wallet, the inhaler, and heavy shoes to shore- then jump in asap. Hasn't ever gotten to that point, thankfully. Because the next point would be some ten year old kid pulling us both to shore.

Dexter was into winning the dime toss games so while Maria and I rode the Big Dipper (yep, Looff again), the boys wandered off and returned with various glassware and bowls. Dexter never makes a secret of not enjoying thrill rides but Oliver seems to love the thrill of a drop, and the splash of water- with Maria, in a log flume.



Treats and a trip downtown for coffee- Santa Cruz benefits from having room so their coffee shops usually have large interiors. You can find several cafes that brew coffee to order and years ago we would visit a place that had a big garden to relax in.



















An old ice cream shop, Marianne's- 50 plus years offers some great flavors year round that our neighborhood Swenson's only offers seasonally or no longer : Blackberry,
Licorice, Root Beer Swirl. And then there are many more flavors that other people like too. A full day for us.

Fitness at Fifty

Many times as I ride the cable car home I see groups of people running in single line form up the hills of California Street. Some are huffing and puffing with a few stragglers falling behind the formidable fit majority. Often there is one who is out of line barking commands or motivation to all the runners. Cailin informs me that this is a fitness camp; something people pay to do to stay in shape. It has the benefit of a community, albeit one driven with a military precision. Initially not too appealing to me.

And yet, at fifty with a desire to see the kids grow up and to witness Maria in spastic laughter for several more decades, I have to think about what I eat, and how I take care of myself. We should do what we can to enjoy our lives as long as we can being sound in mind, soul and body. I understand that.

Start Fitness is run out of Bush Street location, with another location in Nashville. One hour classes in a gym with alternate days of mile runs up and down the hills of the city. The sessions are led by Sgt. Ken, six time soldier of the year and veteran of Operation Desert Storm, he definitely is someone people pay attention to. I know I will.














Sgt. Ken is probably a real nice guy

It's great to know that these options are out there. It's great to do the things I need to do to provide my children the pleasure of my bad jokes, and nagging reminders. The future has possibilities. In fact the only thing better than the future is the present. And in my present it's watching the good people at Bobs Donuts perfect their craft; making these fine fine products, filled with vitamins R,U, Good. And are they good! What a work out!

























this is a riff from one of favorite visual memories: years ago while driving arond the Marina District, we saw a young woman standing in the garage well of a driveway. She was dressed in a full jogging outfit, but not sweating with a cup of coffee in hand and smoking a cigarette. She seemed to be hiding.
In our minds, she told her partner that she was going out for a run, turned the corner and grabbed a cup of coffee and lit up. Dig deeper and this might be a sad story of self esteem issues but taking the visual as it was, and to us, it was a pretty funny sight.

Crabbing with Captain Mike

Yesterday Oliver and I went crabbing with Captain Mike. It's easy to do; the first time we tried to do this two years ago- to our amazement, we pulled up some crabs. So this type of fishing is for me. The experience does carry some fishing zen; waiting if only ten minutes before retrieving the net (the kids prefer five minutes). Also standing on a pier enveloped in fog and above us are seagulls, and below may be a big sea lion that when the spot is full of fisherman, knows that an easy meal is on someone's line. We have had memorable experiences watching leopard sharks and jellyfish, and a couple of times a sea star (star fish) wandered into our net. It can be very cold or as yesterday, very pleasant with minimal wind.

Preparation requires crabbing attire and crabbing state of mind.

Disclosure: we toss back any crabs we catch. You need a net/basket similar to what we have here with a pouch that can hold some chicken or turkey meat. Also a long rope or tie that does not become waterlogged which we have wrapped onto the basket in several places. A good toss in the bay and the basket will soon settle approximately 20 feet down. Crabs will hopefully be attracted to the bait, able to pick out pieces of it, and become distracted about sitting in the basket- even when the basket is being pulled up and out of the water.
such form! keep your feet free from the rope...


Success! Joy! Or just Oliver jumping up and down...Dexter baked in the sun earlier in the day during baseball camp (but secretly wanted to watch Eureka with Maria) so he stayed home although he's always been the #1 assistant. And yes, this can be a little gross.


Red Claw an Rock Crab that has a shell of at least 4" long (maybe it's 6"- but since we never take 'em, i forget the size) can be taken if you have a license or if a young person is crabbing! Dungeness can not be taken in this area for this is where they breed. Always careful as the sides of the pier are very low. Keep an eye on the kids. Have them sit or kneeling when anywhere near the edge.

It's fun looking at other people's buckets- one guy had an eel but accidentally poured it back. The photo of the multiple crabs is from the people who were crabbing across from us. Honestly catching this many would have creeped me out. We caught four today. Four doesn't creep me out.
Part of the fun is trying to pick these guys up from the back- because they can reach back in so many ways and pinch you. Half the time you're just wanting to untangle them from the net. Once they realize that it's generally in their best interest to let go of the bait at this point, they are real grumpy creatures.


I think this is a dungeness. The other photo above is a red claw. No, haven't done much research except prior to our first attempt. Best thing from my research is to use chicken or turkey with bones, and nothing fancy. When we are done, we try to throw the bait into the water for the crabs but the seagulls usually pick off some of the offerings.


Michael got into tossing the guys back. Oliver avoided any possibility of getting pinched. I may try to attach RZradio transmitter tracking devices in the future. The likelihood of my actually doing this is absolutely zero but I did sound scientific for a sentence. Simply it's fun to throw stuff in the water, sit and relax, pull the thing out of the bay to find new residents (hopefully) each time.
Work crew at rest. Pretty satisfied with the way the day has turned out. Oliver is ready to pack up and play catch away from the water on a grassy field. Captain Mike is ready to see Barbara. I'm ready for exercise.

Cool Blue and the Sacred Trust

Sometimes in search of the sun, we will put a low bid on Priceline and succeed on getting a 3 star hotel with a pool for $50 in San Jose, for the night. This pool was great, big, warm enough- and just what we wanted. Fog I love your horns and how you crawl up a hill but glad to leave you, for a day. For D & especially O, a place like New York was acceptable once we could sell him on going somewhere where we had no access to a pool- or New Orleans, with a promise of some pool time daily.

Oliver is also taken to playing catch continously -anywhere, anytime. Both are getting ready to play baseball, sometime, somewhere- although Dexter's interests are becoming more diverse. Maria is wanting Oliver to venture away from the inflattables and learn some swimming skills. He needs more convincing. Dext is more confident in the pool and leads the family in cannonball splashes. Dexter has about 100, I'm up to zero. If I can stroll into the cool blue within 10 minutes, that's good for me.

Recently, Dad allowed himself to be taken to dinner by a group of my Mom's great circle of friends- some that Mom had relationships with for sixty years. It's a bit of a chore to figure the logistics and to get Dad willing to go. However once he's sitting within this loving crowd, my strong man of a Dad becomes emotional and touched by how they wish to be in his company and at the same time, honor my mother and their friend. In conversation around the circular table of immense servings of food, it was a pleasure just to sit with these people, friends and caretakers.

Aunt Blossom who spoke of the first road trip she and my mom took after turning 20 to Los Angeles, staying at a hotel they both were scared to enter the room, and for good reason. It was a hotel for gangsters and their prostitutes. At least the rates were reasonable. At our recent dinner, Blossom's daughter Maggie was there- always a conversationalist speaking about her mother and her recent trip to Egypt. When I was growing up along with my first cousins Judy, Jadey and Doreen, Maggie and her sister Priscilla- I never lacked female role models as friends and equals.

Aunt Helen, vibrant, independent and riding Bart several times a week to get where she needs to. When Uncle Pete was around, I would remember a friendly big guy (he was the muscle man of the family) of quiet, gentle humor. Aunt Helen's sister, Aunt Florence is also my conncection to my relative, Tom Hanks. Aunty Bess who with Uncle Dan always checked in with how I was, had a eatery of some type downtown SF for a time. Aunt May Fong who in later years spent a lot of time with my mom. It finished with let's do this again. Sooner than later. Tonight they gave Dad, life.

I Digress #28

Sarah recently wrote that she "and mosquitoes are not friends" Let me address

Postscript: 7/16. A recent scientific study has found that the smell of smelly socks is more appealing to mosquitos than human skin. Note to sleeping family members: those socks are there for a purpose.

My War On Mosquitoes

I understand that all life is sacred. Should be respected. Preserved. Revered.
However people forget that Ghandi/Thoreau/Plato lived this credo prior to 1961 before the great annoying mosquito coalition (GAMC) came to being. It's no new line of thought that the absence of these parasites might not be a bad thing. Yes, sort of a sun chips level on the food chain and while mosquitoes also consume algae- surely substitutes can be found for a creature that infects 700 million people a year with disease.

I, too have no patience or tolerance for them. If during sleep, Ii hear one mosquito buzz by me I will not rest or sleep until it is destroyed. Maria is often annoyed by my attempts to save our family from these bloodsuckers. She should not be angry that I use her as bait while I wait, completely immersed in the bedsheets (so as not to confuse the mosquito) as it locks in on her. And if a well placed newspaper is not appreciated (why does she get so angry?) , let all know that I have on occasion offered myself as a lure, lights on and waiting, waiting, waiting. An attack by culcidae on my children warrants retribution ten times. Retribution leading to a bloodbath is never a pretty picture; especially when it's my blood.

Why can't I accept mosquitoes as just insects doing what they do? Why can't I ignore them and sleep like everyone else seems to be able to do? Can I sleep while a man outside has no bed, no home? Well, apparently I can. So why can't I, as Maria frequently implores me to do, just turn out the light, forget about the bug, and just go to sleep? Or go to f*****sleep as she sometimes refers to the situation as. And no, I have never hidden beside Maria hoping the mosquito will bite her instead. This goes back to childhood, listening to a buzzing noise in a room shared with my brother when the mosquito flew into my mouth.
Flew into my mouth. GAMC, a blatant violation of all human-bug protocols. GAMC, the beginning of my war on mosquitoes. "From Hell's heart, I stab at thee. For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee!"*

Yes, my brother still obsesses when we stand by the open front door at my parent's house, and this behavior is kind of freaky to continually experience. Also that Mike lumps mosquito eaters with mosquitoes continues to cause confusion to this day. I think of mosquitoes as being the tiny insect but eye mosquito eaters with distrust and caution.
Lastly, I act in the preservation of my family.
A man has to have ethics. It is one of my beliefs and organizing principles. I will let other people call me a hero. Maria?


*Shakespeare/Melville/Khan

J42011

Maria had an ambitious July 4th, hosting not one but three weekend gatherings. And she made it easy and fun. Family and friends on Saturday, then a big bash on Monday, ending with a Fireworks watch sitting on Mason Street, with hundreds of other residents. Home base is the renewed garden- (thanks Cai and Ria!)




A good weekend is one when you can have a several displays of Diet Coke and Mentos eruptions, by the master of carbonation and cratered mints, Dexter. Excellent job, son!


Traci flew in from Chicago to see her
parents, brother Kevin and her grandpa- her Gung Gung.




Monday night we presented Molly's Lemon Shaker Pie- only problem of the 20 or so folks present, doesn't leave much pie.













ooops! unrelated photo. Hot Dog!








There was a lot of fun crazed kid energy Monday night. Here are some of the oldest (they would later run the hallways with Nerf blasters) .





The Diet Coke/Mentos effect does not involve loud noises; no need to be afraid. Later I asked Oliver if he wanted to hide under a plastic shield and you bet he said Yes!



Sometimes it's best just to get out of the way.


















Dad, Sis, Kev, and Maria sharing a moment. It's been a long time since Dad sat in this garden, sat in the sun. I think he was considering time spent here with Mom, and his parents.







boy with soda shield (mostly worked)













It felt good to be. connected. community. with at least one Cupp.










Fini.